Trauma is an emotional wound that causes psychological damage and it is more “extreme” than stress. A life-changing event that can have devastating repercussions on the life and psychological well-being of a partner.
“Trauma damages the brain of the survivor,” according to Mike Dubi of the International trauma Training Institute. He states that the brain never follows the same neural firing patterns that it did before the trauma.
Trusting in the midst of trauma
Many partners find it difficult to trust after the discovery of their loved ones sexual addiction. Nightmares, triggering, suspicion, flashbacks, psychological disturbances, changes in appetite and sleep, avoidance, denial, are among the many things that block a partners ability to trust after discovery and disclosure.
Negative Beliefs
Partners can be plagued with exaggerated negative thoughts, beliefs and expectations that they are unable to silence. “I can’t trust anyone,” “I was not enough,” “I was not good enough.”
Negative emotions
Negative emotions can also be a block to rebuilding trust. These emotions can be a fortress that keeps a partner imprisoned and unable to connect with others because of distrust.
“It is up to the partner to decide how she will create her new paradigm.”
M. J. Welcome
Rebuilding trust
The process of rebuilding trust does not start with the partners loved one; it starts with the partner herself. She needs to believe and know that she did nothing wrong. That it was not her fault. That she was not foolish, to trust and believe her loved one. She needs to establish that she can trust her judgment and herself when it comes to her heart, relationships and her assessments.
What will it take for her to trust herself? Only the partner can answer that. With the help of a partner specialist coach, she will have a safe, trauma sensitive environment in which to focus and explore how to achieve this goal. In the process, she may discover other blocks, hindrances or issues to address.
How to Build Trust after Partner Sexual Addiction Trauma?
It is up to the partner to decide how she will create her new paradigm. She alone possesses the key to her next destination
