Disclosure is when new or secret information is made known. It is the revelation of knowledge that was hidden. This happens in many ways throughout the course of our lives, in science, in religion, in politics and sometimes in families. Hidden information could be the key that unlocks mysteries spurring advancements or it can cause devastation because it opens the door to pain, betrayal and causes tremendous wounding.
Secret Information
Unfortunately, many betrayed partners of sex addicts stumble into secret information about their loved one known as discovery. They were not expecting to be blindsided with sexual addictive behavior. They were safe and secure in their world founded and built on trust. Then things changed and their world in an instant became a lie, a deception, and a falsehood.
Disclosure
In order to make sense of their new reality many betrayed partners of sex addicts seek to know more so they can comprehend the when’s, whys, how’s, where’s, and sometimes the who’s of the situation. This is disclosure. The sex addict or betrayer will begin to reveal the nature of his addiction and it can range from pornography, prostitution, fantasy, extra or excessive sexual relations to masturbation.
Before a partner engages in the disclosure process, she should work with a betrayal trauma specialist coach. A betrayal trauma coach will help her identify boundaries for the disclosure, the areas she requires safety as well as an individualized safety plan.
“Trauma is an injury, not an illness.”
Mike Dubi, International Training Institute (ITTI)
Betrayal Trauma is an INJURY
Discovery and disclosure be shocking to the system of sex addict’s partner. It can overwhelm, shatter, and injure her on many levels, emotionally, socially, physically, sexually, and spiritually. Scientist have noted that trauma has a long lasting effect on the brain. It affect the amygdala, prefrontal cortex and the hippocampus these areas govern a person’s panic response and memory.
A traumatic event like betrayal causes injury to the brain, which changes the way it functions and operates. Trauma is not an illness; it is an injury that requires time and a healing environment.
Healing from Betrayal Trauma
The road to healing from betrayal trauma caused by sex addiction, will look different for each partner, however, it is important to know it is possible to heal from betrayal trauma and partners can live full of love, wholeness and well-being.
